I continue in low mood; the 'Black Dog' and I always seem to end up struggling about this time; I suppose if I wanted to, I could call this Seasonal Affect Disorder. It always seems to coincide with the shortening of the days... but, not only do I dislike what I consider pointless labelling (see: IBS; CFS; Fibromyalgia...), but I actually enjoy this time of year; I enjoy the cold, crisp nights and mornings; I'm not quite so keen on getting up, and going home in the dark, but...
I think it is just overpowering nostalgia. Some of my happiest memories are rooted in these months; and I think it just serves to remind me how far I've travelled from them. I miss my friends and my family increasingly these days, and all the more so at this time of year. This year, my mind is troubled with impending exams, and the amount of work I haven't done - some things never change, I guess.
I think this is especially hard on La Belle Fille, who works as hard as I do, for less money and with considerably more organisation; so she finds it hard to see why I should be so stressed, and hard to find ways to help me. And she finds it hard to put up with my bleak moods; the stress isn't good for our relationship, which already labours under the constraints of both our jobs. I know she reads from time to time, so hope she'll manage to put up with my increasingly monk-ish behaviour over the next few months.
Name in lights...
1 comment:
Hello love,
Nice to be back reading blogs again. I've missed it.
I'm sorry to hear of your bleak mood. I feel the same as you over the dark periods- this is my favourite time of the year, but I find it depressing getting up at 5am in the dark and getting home at 9pm in the dark.
Stay in touch!
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